"My diet starts tomorrow..."

"My diet starts tomorrow..." how many times have we said this. Personally, i think I say it when I am feeling guilty. I pride myself in fitness and eating healthy. I have to have something to selfishly obsess about. Some people have other addictions, like alcohol, tobacco, drugs, even Overeating. Me, its keeping up with my health. I try to say the main reason is so I can be healthy, but for the most part its vanity. I mean don't we all want to have a six pack, and toned arms and legs? no? not everyone? Well I guess I give myself, what seems like an impossible goal, so I can stay motivated. Well even the most obsessed workout-aholic falls off the wagon some time. Me.... I do it everytime I reach my weight goal. I dont know why I do it. Everytime I reach this goal, I feel great, I have more energy, and I feel comfortable in anything I put on. So why do I stop doing what Im doing and go haywire?? I'll tell you why.2 reasons. 1. I love food. I love food so much I feel like I talk about it any chance I get. I wake up in the morning and the first thing I think of is, hmmm what should I eat? I finish my workout and think hmmm....what should I eat? I get Rian off the bus in the afternoon and think hmmmm.... what should I make for dinner? , so I can eat!!! and 2. I think I have nothing to obsess about anymore, so I make myself relax for awhile so I can gain just enough weight back(not to much, now, afterall Im still vain)just like 5 to 8 pounds, just so I can freak myself out enough to get back to what im good at. OBSESSING over the gym, protein bars, protein shakes, energy drinks, and good ol' lowfat diets!! Well I am to that point, as my lovely husband(who is just as bad as me)so nicely reminded me yesterday. Yes I know, I have reached that point where my skin is not as nice,(I credit that to my sugar fixes, and sweet tooth), as well as my butt. Ok, so I have had a little desert EVERY night for the past, I dunno, month. Is it a crime?? Well as Im reasurring myself that its ok to have a little milkshake with dinner, because, afterall, I am having salad and soup to eat, I tell myself this is ok. Then Jason gives me that look like your kidding yourself. Rage fills my body. OK, so what if my soup is Chicken Tortilla, not the most calorie friendly soup to choose from, and so what if I use the whole thing of not fatfree Ranch sauce all over. It is SOUP and SALAD for heavens sake! Now this shouldn't have been a problem but I knew deep inside this wasn't a very healthy choice, and although it is ok to eat bad sometimes, I haven't been eating good enough lately, to eat bad. So I say afterwards, in my guilty voice, yes you guessed it..."my diet starts tomorrow! again." And it has, so far.